Do this one thing and it will change the way you live your life. And, it's simpler than you might think.
By Cindy Yantis
I was going to be seeing some people I hadn’t seen in awhile, a couple of them with whom I shared some history. Enough history that I had some angst about seeing them. Enough so that I started rehearsing dialog in my head days before, playing out various scenarios – some good, some not so good – and rummaging in my closet to decide what to wear so that I looked more at ease than I felt.
Ever been there? Sometimes it can take over and become another character in the room, the character that plays out the scenarios which stops you from being present with what’s really happening in the moment. Stops you from being you.
At a recent women’s retreat I was part of fabulous discussion where we tapped into a notion that flipped a switch for all of us. The idea of being Available. Wha??? Certainly, it's a word we're all familiar with, but this way of thinking about it was new and enthralling.
To get to that aha moment, we acknowledged where in our lives we were not there, where things felt stuck or stagnant or scary. Where we stopped ourselves from moving forward or from having a tough discussion or from asking for what we want/need. Where we had showed up halfway for fear of the not knowing, or where we edited ourselves down to being a fraction of who we are because of wanting to avoid conflict. Where we were trying to control the situation so much that we put others off and eventually lost control in a bigger way.
So we asked, what’s the shift that will change who we are in those circumstances? It’s more than being authentic, although that’s vital too. It’s more than being present. It’s more than being open.
It’s being actively present and open, which we determined meant being Available.
Being Available means being actively present and open. That unlocked the gateway. Or rather, blasted it wide open!
Then, we gave it voice, which birthed a mantra that carries you boldly into any situation. It literally calms and revs your energy at the time. It centers you, gives you confidence and allows your heart to lead the way. And, being mindfully available is a starter, not a stopper. And, it’s simple.
Follow “I’m available” with whatever you’re about to do, or what you're desiring to make happen.
- I’m available for this meeting.
- I’m available for this discussion.
- I’m available for my next, better job. I’m available for this interview
- I’m available for, to and in this relationship.
- I’m available for this phone call.
- I’m available for this date.
- I’m available for my body to be healthy.
- I’m available for and to my best life.
Try it! I’m available…
It makes it even more powerful when you incorporate it into conversation with people. "I'm available to and for creating the best solution for all of us." Taking ownership of your availability is so incredibly empowering.
Being in a state and mindset of availability allows you to really show up. It can be a baby step toward fulfilling a big goal, or toward conquering a fear. Just be available for the baby step, and just the baby step. Then, the next step and the next. And, when the big opportunity presents itself, you’re ready and AVAILABLE!
Being available - and stating that you're available - helps to release expectations and false foregone conclusions.
Being available means being undefended, knowing there's nothing you have to defend. Being defensive or defended closes off your availability. You're just available and that's enough.
Consistently being available makes what seemed impossible much more possible. It removes the chains that have held you back from all that is possible for you.
Thus begins a new way of thinking, of showing up for ourselves and to the world. I do it all the time now and guess what? I'm available!